The brown eye won't let me do that either.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
