Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(909): View more from California

I just didn't expect you to be so naked....

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(513): View more from Ohio

I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.

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(440): View more from Ohio

Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?

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(651): View more from Minnesota

asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.

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(773): View more from Illinois

Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I think I just cured my dogs munchies

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(662): View more from Mississippi

I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.

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