You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
