Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
it's great music for shaving your balls
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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