We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
