its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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