Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
