Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
false alarm, still single
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