I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
