this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
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