Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
