My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
this boner is exhausting
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
