idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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