i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Randomize