fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
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