Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..

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(607): View more from New York

I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.

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(512): View more from Texas

I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing

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(253): View more from Washington

I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.

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