even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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