You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
