these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
