He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
