just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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