A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
is wine microwaveable?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
