I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
