what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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