Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
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