so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
My breasts were aching with rage.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
