some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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