i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
