their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
