I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
There are leaves in my underwear?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
