that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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