my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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