i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
