She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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