Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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