I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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