I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
