Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize