I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
