just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I'm always down for nudity.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize