That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
