White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
