I want to walk on stilts...naked
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you win again, gameday.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
