The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
