that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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