You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
