Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize