oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
