Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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