The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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