I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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